Aujourd'hui était une journée difficile.
Le plus important est de ne pas perdre la foi et de rester persistant.

Labels: life

Time flies when you're having fun but they also creep away just as quickly when you're busy. Personally, I find myself really enjoying being busy, probably for the past three years now. Recently I found myself slowing down, not so much by choice, but the need to just pause for a moment, assess everything around me, and question a few things. You can say I'm at a crossroad once again, just as I was two years ago when I was panicking for the HSC and unsure as to where it would take me and ultimately whether or not it would be the right place for me.

For a while now I have been hearing lots of compliments and envies regarding what I've been doing since I graduated Year 12. Honestly? When I first entered university I thought it was all a mistake.

I was initially accepted into my first choice which was the Bachelor of International Relations and Law at the Australian National University located in Canberra. It was my dream university, degree and in my favourite city in Australia. However, at the time I was travelling across Europe and China to celebrate the completion of high school exams and due to what I exposed to, I had lots of conflicting thoughts and wondered whether or not it's really what I should do. I contemplated going to TAFE to do a make-up course or learn about making coffee. My grandpa was also against the possibility of attending ANU. Like many others, he thought Canberra is a 'hole' and he wanted me to be close to my parents. What ultimately sealed the deal though, was the fact how expensive rent was down there. Since I hesitated for so long, I failed to find off-campus accommodation and on-campus wasn't really an option because the price was just ridiculous. I could've asked my parents for financial assistance but for some unknown reason, and I still can't answer this today as to why I made such a decision, I said to myself that I will not spend a single cent of my parents' money after I graduate Year 12.

It hurt. When I pressed 'reject offer' for ANU. It still hurts thinking about it today, though I have no regrets. If it's really meant to be, I can always return in my later years to study my second degree there, perhaps a Masters or something. I subsequently applied for the University of Technology, Sydney's Bachelor of Business and Law. I never imagined myself going to UTS. I always thought it would be either ANU or University of Sydney because my dad went there.

I was accepted and upon returning from my two months trip, jumped into university life straight away. At first, I didn't like UTS but with the benefit of hindsight, I think I was confused with the disliking of universities in general from my own university. UTS is a great place - I love it now (although to be completely honest, while the whole 'trimesters' thing might work for some degrees, it is not such good news for a law degree). I did find first year challenging because of the high expectations of self-productivity and control but after a while, I found my standing.

It was all a rollercoaster ride after that. I got my first job as a climb leader at BridgeClimb, taking climbers from all around the world up to the top of the amazing and symbolic structure that is the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The training process was so damn difficult, I can still recall the details vividly and how tired I was leaving home at 5 or 6am and returning at 5pm, jumping straight into bed, and that continued for three weeks. Starting wasn't easy either because it was my first job and I didn't know a lot of things, including how to talk and deal with people. That aside, I knew I was beyond lucky to have such a position as my first paying job. Even today I sometimes think I take it for granted.

A month after BridgeClimb I also took up a position as an English and Economics tutor at a coaching centre, specialising in Year 11 and 12 students. Later on, I also began working as a personal tutor. Therefore, by June 2015 I found myself working three jobs, beyond part-time hours and on most weeks edging close to full-time hours, whilst juggling my full-time degree. It was so damn hard but I found myself secretly enjoying it. It wasn't until much later that I realised this personal enjoyment and satisfaction, even a guilty pleasure if you will, came at a heavy price.

Eventually, I found out that I no longer have time for my friends nor my family. My younger brother Chris is seven years old currently and it's been a while since I've spent some quality time with him. I missed out on a lot of his 'firsts' and I always make the promise of going to the movies with him on the weekends, but I only get one Saturday/Sunday off every few months or so, and this is horrible to admit to but when I finally had a day off, I wanted to do nothing but to stay home and do nothing. For me, anything that involved me leaving my house door felt like work. Even spending time with my family wasn't enjoyable anymore, and I found myself counting the hours I felt like was 'wasted' when I was at a dinner with them when I could've been studying or working. It felt so wrong. It shouldn't be like this. I was nineteen. Regardless, the year came and went, and I felt strangely satisfied.

This year started off even crazier than the last. I decided to pick up another degree, being a Bachelor of Arts (France) part-time and found myself juggling that with my Business/Law degree and my three jobs. Somehow I survived the first semester and even today I wonder how I did. I knew there was something wrong though. I didn't sleep enough, four hours was the norm and five even if I'm lucky so I began having headaches and often, out of the blue, I felt dizzy and wanted to faint and this continued for close to two months and I knew I had to make some changes.

I knew, but I didn't. You can say and know things, but whether or not you follow up and do them is a completely different story. I ended up putting my Arts degree on pause after one semester, and when I started my Spring semester I promised to give myself some time off, then an amazing opportunity came up. A Social Marketing and Media Internship position at my university's careers department. I read the job description and everything screamed me. I applied and got it. Then, to make that extra icing on top, I got the executive position of a Marketing Director at one of the university's student societies. So before I got my head straight I ended up still doing BridgeClimb, my public and private tutoring and now with these two additional responsibilities. Again, hard work balancing everything but everything went by really well surprisingly once again and I even managed to even squeeze in some personal commitments here and there.

Now, two other fantastic opportunities had opened up and I just can't bring myself to say no to. One is a Legal Intern position at my university and another is helping out with someone's start up business and personal projects and she is someone I've looked up to since last year after meeting her at a law conference. I am not confident about getting the Legal position because I made a very careless and easily avoidable mistake during the interviews. I think recently I have definitely been all up in my head and got a bit full of myself so this is a mistake I will remember for a long time to come and use it to keep reminding myself to never repeat it. Regardless, my point is, is that it seems like I just can't bring myself to slow down but I think I probably should...

Lately, it appears everyone around me is either proud and envious of what I've done in the past year and a half. Besides all the work and academic commitments I have already discussed, I brought my own car and moved out to Chippendale, Central Park for a while. Some have heavily criticised my 'changes' and I definitely see where they are coming from. However, at the same time, I also want people to know, and this includes my parents, of what I've done and gone through in the past twenty-one months. To be understanding of my fear of failure and fall behind in life and that is why I can't slow down, and also for my friends especially to appreciate that I have worked immensely hard to have what I own today and I made a lot of sacrifices. I am tired and I wish everyone around me would cut me some slack whether it's the lack of time I have for personal commitments or for having 'the things I have, which I have brought and earned myself, that most people our age can't have'.

Trust me. I am having a hard time figuring out whether or not this is all worth it, or if I am doing the right thing. I have doubts about various things every single day as soon as I open my eyes.

For now though, since I am still unsure, I will most likely keep on going. I hope that I will have the strength to continue. Even if I do pause, I hope it is not a sign that I am weak but that I am simply recovering and preparing to become even stronger. Even if one day I do break down, it will be alright and I will soon find the strength to stand back up and move forward once again.

Labels: life, thoughts, university

The morning start off pretty well, with the news of Khan being found guilty of murder for the death of Mr. Chris Noble. If you haven't been following the news it all began in September 2014 when Adeel Ahmad Khan decided to set his own convenience store on fire, despite knowing that there are various individuals and families living above the store. It caused an explosion and fire, which ultimately resulted in the death of Mr. Noble and mother Mrs. Bianka O'Brien and her son, Jude.

Allegedly, Khan decided to set his Rozelle store on fire in attempting to retrieve insurance compensation for it, as he was later revealed to be in debt of over $300,000 AUD. Granted, I really haven't followed this story closely and continuously enough to know of all the public details but from the amount of news articles and court reports I have read on it, I can conclude that innocent lives were taken far too early that day due to the greed and brutality of another human-being. According to court recounts, Khan showed no display of emotion when the juries returned with a guilty verdict. 

Juries are yet to decided on whether Khan should be found guilty of the murder of Mrs O'Brien and her son due to the manner of conduction of the case and trial, with different sets of relevant facts for O'Brien and Noble. I am hopeful though.

In other news, it really has been a while since my last update. A lot has happened, mostly good things. It's funny how things can change so much in just a few months. I'll save them for another day, when I am not actually supposed to be studying for my finals. 

Second year of university. Tort Law. Criminal Law. Accounting B. 

Labels: life, university

Beginnings, Ends and In-betweens. 

Labels: life

"Thing Called Love" 
- Above and Beyond

Labels: life, lyrics

First post of 2014. I can't believe I didn't even post anything in January - first miss in four years, dating all the way back to 2009 (this blog started in December 2008). This basically means that right here, I have - attempted to anyway - documented various events of my short life from Year 7 onwards; beginning to high school to now the upcoming end. Six years. 

I am embarrassed of the immaturity that flows through the entries of my early blogging years but I don't want to go back and delete them. It'll be the equivalent of editing or removing parts of the flaws that underpins the foundation of developing you into the person with the identity you have today, and deep inside we all know that's not humanely possible in real life so why do it here? I'm more than happy to embrace those cringe worthy lines. Maybe six years from now I'll be reading this very post and think "heck, why was I trying to be so deep?" or maybe just a "WTF" moment but you know, we all have to work with our ever changing expectations, it wouldn't be fair to judge the past with the current standards now would it?

Year 12 started last year and so in theory I'm reaching the end of Term 2 already. Year 11 passed like a breeze - a good, comforting, warming breeze. I hope I can say the same thing for this year. 

Officially finished with my half-yearlies yesterday. The two last subjects were English Extension and Modern History. As usual, I try not to self-evaluate after exams so I didn't really think much about them afterwards. I have a general idea of what I want to do after high school but what you want to do is different from what you can do. For now I'll just have to try my best and ensure everything's done to the best of my abilities.

Mum came back with my brother from their one month and a half holiday trip and she brought back some of the best presents: books -- a lot of them, good ones too. I am waiting diligently for the translation of Haruki Murakami's newest novel Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage to be released, scheduled for sometime in August (birthday month, coincidence much?). Murakami is also publishing a new short stories collection so it'll take a while before the English translation is available but nevertheless, I'm excited because my appreciation for short stores is growing day by day. Personally I think they should be more difficult to nail than novels or novellas. Since it's a short, meaning limited in the volume of words, it also has to be concise. To have a great short story you really have to judicial about what to write. That's why short stories that manages to leave behind a long message always amaze me. 

What else? Picking up a copy of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children: Hollow City. Starting Battle Royale , The Marriage Plot and finish off the rest of my Murakami collection. Before all that though, I should really finish Memoirs of a Geisha for my History Extension project and Wuthering Heights (in this case, actually open the book). Frankenstein was surprisingly good. If I have to list a list of the books school has made me read in a order of preference, it would probably be third, after The Great Gatsby and 1984, then you have Fahrenheit 451, Utopia and Northanger Abbey. 

Initially I was angry with prescribed texts for assassinating the joy of reading. It's just less fun when you are forced to read a particular work. The worst bit is when you know you can't read it for pure enjoyment, rather you have to do an "in-depth analysis" and later write an essay about it. It just kills reading. Of course, I shouldn't complain because it has introduced me to some great authors, like George Orwell and F. Scott Fitzgerald, now my favourite author after Murakami. Fortunately the joy is coming back. 

As the HSC is sneaking somewhere around the corner and getting closer every second I've rediscovered my appreciation for books. Don't get me wrong, I don't really have time to read them (we are well into March and the only book I've actually managed to finish so far is 160 170 180 by Chen Chen) but I've been ordering various books and crossing them off my wish list. It releases my stress -- not compulsive internet shopping -- but when they arrive in the mail and I place them onto my own book shelves, knowing they're there, waiting to be read. It also encourages me to do well, so I won't feel guilty when I do get through them after the big exam in November. 

Phew, that was a long post. Perhaps it'll make up for my absence in the past three months. Till  next time. 

Listening: XO by Beyonce
Reading: A Journey, Through Time, with Anthony III by Anthony 
Addicted: good books and short stories

Labels: life, school

Year 11 officially finished three days ago, for me anyway. For a selected few it ended more than a week earlier, but I'm actually glad I finished late, to be able to finish on the actual last day, for both Year 11 and 12 alike. For the last two weeks or so I was preparing and sitting for the yearly exams, with English Extension being the last exam. 

So, I can't say I felt good with every single exam, because I know I definitely made mistakes and so many things I could have done better but there's no point in saying this now. All I can do now is simply wait for the actual results to arrive. 

On the last day, to mark the end of Year 11, yearly exams and just stress from the past month in general, I met up with a friend I've known since primary. Since we go to different schools now we have a tradition of some sort, if you will, to catch up once every school holidays. What do we do? We just talk, and if you want to be specific, I guess 'gossip' will be a better word, but I prefer 'catching up'. We just share stories of ourselves and those around us, such as a event that we can't help but judge silently (hey, we are humans too), or the internal changes we've noticed on some friends and the list goes on really. 

What really caught my attention that day was the whole talk on those around us who are considered to be popular, and we would become sentimental over their previous self - the one we knew, and were much more comfortable with. Don't get me wrong, not all changes are bad, there has been some good changes in friends we've noticed, but unfortunately the negatives overrides the positives. At the end of the day, the so called positive changes to me is really about getting to know yourself and becoming more you - individualized. 

If the real you is dropping out of school and start working at this age or going out to as many parties as possible in order to become known as the popular one, then so be it. Then there should be no negatives I hear you thinking? Well, there are some who I feel who are this way because the people around them are acting and expecting a similar behavior. If you are a certain way due to expectations then you are not yourself, period, and of course you can't claim to be an individual, not a happy one at the end of the day anyway. The again, these are just my opinions, of course I hope the people we talked about were not influenced, but rather this is who they truly are. 

I'm glad I was able to realize this early. Maybe it's due to our schooling years coming to an end soon, recently a lot of people have been discussing about the times when they just entered high school, and as a result some have been saying to me, "I remember when you were in Year 8, you looked a lot better", yeah well, I wasn't happy. Truth to be told I agree with the whole appearance comment. Of course I looked better. I was underweight, wore make up every single day and dyed my hair every three weeks or so. But was I happy? Those are two very different things; looking good on the outside and feeling good on the inside. Sure, since I gained weight, chopped my hair (literally) and stopped wearing make up in Year 9 people have made comments, but I was a much more happier person back then and I didn't really give a damn if my facebook photos were no longer liked by as many people or people stopped inviting me to events. I became a happier person. Why? I don't know, but I think it has something among the lines of truly getting to know myself better and what I'm comfortable with. Like I said, if for you it's partying and for me it's staying at home with a good book then so be it, I'm not going to judge you so you shouldn't judge in return either. 

Anyway, to celebrate the first day of holidays, technically today, being Monday and all, I played Sims for a few hours, finished the latest issue of Frankie, read Atonement for a while, and surfed the net. Productive I know, but isn't that the whole point of having a holiday? To be so productive is the whole purpose of having a break. I think I might finished the night off with an episode of Breaking Bad and the film The Help or maybe Kill Kill instead. 

In other news, I can't believe we're already into September and I've only posted six entries this year. I still remember the days when I tried to blog at least once every two days, then slowly it turned into once a week, a month... There were things I wanted to record, but I couldn't, not on here anyway. Of course I have an actual journal in real life, so most things go in there instead. I guess I became more lazy overtime knowing I lost the majority of my followers due to my long absence. What's more I've had another online blog located on another server for about two years now, and I'm much more happier with the audience over there as compared to here. Will I ever give up Blogger? Nah. I started this in Year 6 so it's been with me for quite sometime, even if I stop updating here on the future I will never delete this place. I may set it to private instead, but I will never be able to terminate it completely. 

Wow, this just might be my longest entry in a year, or maybe even more :B

Listening: Say Love (사랑한다 말해요) - Lim Kim 

Reading: too many to list 

Labels: life, random, school

The hours, the days, sometimes they just swing by in a flash. I get tired so easily, before I know it it's already the afternoon and I have done absolutely nothing because I just want to fall into my bed and never wake up again. If it all just ends like that then I don't have to deal with anything anymore. Does this given off the impression of being weak? So be it. 

Underneath it all, do we really have a family? Or are we just different and soulless individuals living under the same roof? 

Labels: family, life

What do you mean I actually have a blog? Ha. I remember I used to update every single day. Damn, wasn't I annoying? Sorry it took me so long to realise it myself. So I just came back from my one month long holiday trip two nights ago and let's just say that at the end of the day, I love nothing more than my own bedroom. 

There's only a few more days until I begin Year 11. I'm not as excited as I should be, simply because I don't think I am ready yet. Then again, I didn't think I was ready for Year 10. Look at me now, at least I survived and better than expected. 

2013, please be kind to me. 

Listening: MFBTY - Sweet Dream Reading: Addicted: 

Labels: life

Labels: angry, life

Listening: Kill This Love – Epik High 

Reading: 1Q84 – Haruki Murakami 

Labels: life, school

In just a week I will be starting the last term of Year Ten. Maybe it's because I haven't been posting very much but it feels like this year will be ending sooner than I expected. In February I complained about stress and subject selections, not knowing what to do and what I am capable of and now I'm always at the end of the journey - for now anyway. 

My subjects for next year have all been confirmed two weeks ago and I got all of my choices, that's something worth celebrating. I am still unsure over maths, but what's the worst thing that can possibly happen? If it really doesn't work out well then I guess I might just drop it during the first four weeks... Fingers crossed everything will go well. 

Before I worry about that though, I really should start studying for my yearly exams. Surprisingly enough, even though I did study harder than usual it was still unexpected, I got a quite decent report for my half yearly. More than decent in fact but I don't want to jinx anything. Hopefully, if luck is really by my side this year after all, I would be able to achieve the same results, if not even better for my yearly. 

Holidays... Not much to share. Been staying at home and feeding myself with Gentleman's Dignity and Bridal Mask. I am becoming more boring and happier. 

Labels: life, school

My last entry dated all the way back in May, proving just how lazy I have gotten after Year Ten started. I do have legit reasons - at least for me anyway. School, isn't that enough of an excuse? It's paid off though, I am more than happy with my half-yearly report, the best I've ever gotten in fact. They do say how much you put in is how you you gain back yes?

Due to my inner nerd being up-front for so long there really isn't much to share. Would you like to hear about how I studied for my exams? Ha. If I have to share something it would be that under the influence of my friends I decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey. Despite it being a 'rated' novel I am not ashamed to admit I read it, finished the whole series in fact, in just a week. Curiousity got the best of me. I can see why it's so popular, especially among women but in terms of how capable the author Mrs. E.L.James is, she's still on the level of online fan-fiction, which is what she started off with. The rave right now isn't going to last forever and based on her writing abilities it'll be hard to have another work published and bcome as popular as Fifty Shades. James doesn't need another though, she's earned more than enough just from these three books in the past few months.With a movie production coming along and the book still doing pretty well in terms of sales who needs to write another book anyway?

What else is there to share? Vampire Idol which I started watching a few weeks back. I'm currently twenty-five episodes in with another fifty to go perhaps? Surprisngly, it's good. I wasn't expecting much, watching it just for the face of Lee Soo Hyuk, worthy enough. The writing and directing however is more enjoyable than I thought. They story-line is simple enough ti follow and once you get past that stubborn stage of the first few episodes you're in for a smooth ride. Lately because of the stress I have been feeling from school a drama like this = fast paced and funny really does cheer me up.

There's also Vampire Prosecutor 2 I am looking forward to. Mum's watching Flower Boy Ramyun Shop (did I even spell that right? My hangul is really going down...) and raving about Jung Ill Woo. Speaking of kimchi, those who have watched the drama would understand the link here - my mum decided we should go Korean BBQ for my birthday. Fine by me, I haven't had kimchi for ages.

Labels: life, school

Labels: life

Labels: life, school

Yeah, I remember those days, when I used to update every single day. Was my life that interesting back then or did I just go on and on about useless events? The second one makes more sense to me. There's hardly anything worthy of talking about these days. Unless you think going to school is interesting enough for minor details.


I like going to school, but it isn't the most exciting thing. Especially not when you're in Year 10. I can only imagine what the next two years would be like. To say I am just slightly nervous about the tests coming up would be the understatement of mine in a century. I am beyond stressed. Of course, sitting here and typing this wouldn't really help but it's a nice break from all the studying. 


My mum and Chris' finally coming back next Sunday. Would it be weird if I just end the entry here? Maybe, but I have nothing else to share. 


Until next time. 

Listening: Shine Over Me - Wanting Reading: I Think There's Something Wrong With Me - Nigel SmithAddicted: 

Labels: life

A while back ago I promised I would try and use my photography from now for the top picture on each entry and I failed after two attempts. It's not that I have don't have enough photos, in fact I have folders and folders filled with final edits, all completed but I guess I'm so lazy that I can't even be bothered uploading them to a file image server to use.

Instead of starting off again with what I should do and what I promise to do, I'll start with what I have been doing. Besides busy procrastinating (which I really shouldn't because I have a major Maths exam coming up this very Thursday) I have been busy finishing off the dramas I have been watching. Yes, before you all start to judge me you should know I hardly ever watch them. Maybe around five each year, but once I start I can't stop.

For Korean dramas, which for the majority I honestly cannot get into or relate to because they're so cliche, there'll always be a few exceptions. One prime example would be my ultimate bias Lee Junki. I will literally get through all the way of a really bad drama just to see his face. He's a good actor don't get me wrong (at least he started it off that way in The King and the Clown) but he slowly lost it after My Girl.

Take Hero for example, the directing and acting was alright but the whole story is so boring that I lost interest after five episodes but still, I managed to finish it all for that face of his. Orignally I had really high expectations because the drama revolves around a photojournalist and as someone who's really interested in journalism, I really wanted to see it despite the 'this-show-is-so-boring' reviews out there. Lesson learnt; never ignore the majority's view.

The story here today is pretty much similar, except all you need to do is replace Lee Junki with Park Shi Hoo but with better acting, directing and the overall plot. While I'm here, bless South Korea for making their men going to the army. They always come back looking like a completely differnet person. Korean dramas have an unspoken tradition of granting shower scenes for recently army returned male actors (uh, hello? Abs? Yeah, pretty obvious) and sometimes it does get a bit overrated but hey, I am not complaining.

In just two weeks I finished five dramas, maybe it's not a lot for some out there but for me - someone who barely gets through five a year is huge. I read rave reviews for two of them and I just couldn't help it. The two being Princess' Man and Flower Boy Ramen Shop. Judging from the title of them I wasn't exactly expecting anything. Sorry, but flower boy instant noodle shop? Yeah... But I was more than impressed at the end.

49 Days was enjoyable as well and What's Up is way underrated compared to the overrated, obviously being Dream High 2. Now I am really ready to announce my farwell to dramas this year. For now anyways.

In other news, my Nikon D70 recently passed away. It's been seven years so I'm not exactly surprised but I will miss it terribly. Thank you for being always there for me. The new Nikon D700 won't be able to replace you - ever.

Labels: life

(Bye bye Facebook)
So I finally switched to the new Blogger layout which has been available forever. Everything is new and it will take a while for me to get used to it but I feel like the change is actually towards the better. I actually like this new design, I feel easier to blog and the post settings have improved by a lot. Unlike Facebook's up-coming time line. At the moment my profile is still waiting to be 'upgraded' but from what I've been seeing so far on other people's profiles, I absolutely dislike it. In fact I might deactivate my account as soon as it switches to the time line view, since I'm not that active on it any more. Blogger, how shall I express my love towards you? Seriously. I like the new Blogger Dashboard so much I feel like I'm actually going to blog more now. 


To start off, I lost my phone today. Yes - again. People just love my phone. Whoever took it, I hope you will have a great sleep tonight and you won't end up feeling guilty. Who am I kidding? You probably do these type of stuff all the time. Have fun going through my photos, messages and everything. You crazy paedophile stalker. Besides losing all those adorable videos of my brother (which matters the most but I'll get over it eventually... maybe... no... who am I kidding, you can never ever replace those videos) I have also lost all of my contact numbers. Which really doesn't bother me that much since I don't talk to more than half of the people I have but collecting all the numbers I need will definitely be a pain in the behind. Maybe it's a sign - to start everything from scratch, yeah, including my social life which I never really had one. Are you trying to tell me that 2012 will be a life changing year here? Ha. 


Since my plan won't be finished until February next year I guess I will just be phone-less in the mean time. During holidays, that's right. It just started yesterday officially and I have already lost my phone. Why am I stressing myself so much? It's not like I used to be on it 24/7, in fact, I check it every two-three days. I guess knowing the fact you don't have it right there next to you is a different story. 


Having typed all that about my phone, it's time for something else. I brought the dress I would be wearing to the party on the cruise. I've actually never ever went shopping for a proper party dress before and I was right, it was deadly boring. I hate how you have to try on every single one to see if it looks nice, apparently according to my mum you can never judge if a dress (or clothing in general) will look good on you unless you try it on. She claims it to be something that everyone knows. Well, I didn't. In the end, after two hours of shopping around we both finally settled on a blue one. I would show you guys what it looks like but I can't be bothered. 


I shall end the entry here by saying I am really tired and I am going to sleep. 

Labels: life

This guy right here is perfection. No, I'm kidding but he has such unique features. Male models usually don't leave a deep impression for me but this guy here did - big time.

Labels: life

August and anything but bored. How did I ever mange to update every single day? Since majority of my time are being taken over my school and all, my life is very boring right now and with this I don't really see what I should type about any more. It was never a "all-about-my-life" place but lately I have been feeling really uninspired and tired.

Labels: life

Aujourd'hui était une journée difficile.
Le plus important est de ne pas perdre la foi et de rester persistant.

Labels: life

Time flies when you're having fun but they also creep away just as quickly when you're busy. Personally, I find myself really enjoying being busy, probably for the past three years now. Recently I found myself slowing down, not so much by choice, but the need to just pause for a moment, assess everything around me, and question a few things. You can say I'm at a crossroad once again, just as I was two years ago when I was panicking for the HSC and unsure as to where it would take me and ultimately whether or not it would be the right place for me.

For a while now I have been hearing lots of compliments and envies regarding what I've been doing since I graduated Year 12. Honestly? When I first entered university I thought it was all a mistake.

I was initially accepted into my first choice which was the Bachelor of International Relations and Law at the Australian National University located in Canberra. It was my dream university, degree and in my favourite city in Australia. However, at the time I was travelling across Europe and China to celebrate the completion of high school exams and due to what I exposed to, I had lots of conflicting thoughts and wondered whether or not it's really what I should do. I contemplated going to TAFE to do a make-up course or learn about making coffee. My grandpa was also against the possibility of attending ANU. Like many others, he thought Canberra is a 'hole' and he wanted me to be close to my parents. What ultimately sealed the deal though, was the fact how expensive rent was down there. Since I hesitated for so long, I failed to find off-campus accommodation and on-campus wasn't really an option because the price was just ridiculous. I could've asked my parents for financial assistance but for some unknown reason, and I still can't answer this today as to why I made such a decision, I said to myself that I will not spend a single cent of my parents' money after I graduate Year 12.

It hurt. When I pressed 'reject offer' for ANU. It still hurts thinking about it today, though I have no regrets. If it's really meant to be, I can always return in my later years to study my second degree there, perhaps a Masters or something. I subsequently applied for the University of Technology, Sydney's Bachelor of Business and Law. I never imagined myself going to UTS. I always thought it would be either ANU or University of Sydney because my dad went there.

I was accepted and upon returning from my two months trip, jumped into university life straight away. At first, I didn't like UTS but with the benefit of hindsight, I think I was confused with the disliking of universities in general from my own university. UTS is a great place - I love it now (although to be completely honest, while the whole 'trimesters' thing might work for some degrees, it is not such good news for a law degree). I did find first year challenging because of the high expectations of self-productivity and control but after a while, I found my standing.

It was all a rollercoaster ride after that. I got my first job as a climb leader at BridgeClimb, taking climbers from all around the world up to the top of the amazing and symbolic structure that is the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The training process was so damn difficult, I can still recall the details vividly and how tired I was leaving home at 5 or 6am and returning at 5pm, jumping straight into bed, and that continued for three weeks. Starting wasn't easy either because it was my first job and I didn't know a lot of things, including how to talk and deal with people. That aside, I knew I was beyond lucky to have such a position as my first paying job. Even today I sometimes think I take it for granted.

A month after BridgeClimb I also took up a position as an English and Economics tutor at a coaching centre, specialising in Year 11 and 12 students. Later on, I also began working as a personal tutor. Therefore, by June 2015 I found myself working three jobs, beyond part-time hours and on most weeks edging close to full-time hours, whilst juggling my full-time degree. It was so damn hard but I found myself secretly enjoying it. It wasn't until much later that I realised this personal enjoyment and satisfaction, even a guilty pleasure if you will, came at a heavy price.

Eventually, I found out that I no longer have time for my friends nor my family. My younger brother Chris is seven years old currently and it's been a while since I've spent some quality time with him. I missed out on a lot of his 'firsts' and I always make the promise of going to the movies with him on the weekends, but I only get one Saturday/Sunday off every few months or so, and this is horrible to admit to but when I finally had a day off, I wanted to do nothing but to stay home and do nothing. For me, anything that involved me leaving my house door felt like work. Even spending time with my family wasn't enjoyable anymore, and I found myself counting the hours I felt like was 'wasted' when I was at a dinner with them when I could've been studying or working. It felt so wrong. It shouldn't be like this. I was nineteen. Regardless, the year came and went, and I felt strangely satisfied.

This year started off even crazier than the last. I decided to pick up another degree, being a Bachelor of Arts (France) part-time and found myself juggling that with my Business/Law degree and my three jobs. Somehow I survived the first semester and even today I wonder how I did. I knew there was something wrong though. I didn't sleep enough, four hours was the norm and five even if I'm lucky so I began having headaches and often, out of the blue, I felt dizzy and wanted to faint and this continued for close to two months and I knew I had to make some changes.

I knew, but I didn't. You can say and know things, but whether or not you follow up and do them is a completely different story. I ended up putting my Arts degree on pause after one semester, and when I started my Spring semester I promised to give myself some time off, then an amazing opportunity came up. A Social Marketing and Media Internship position at my university's careers department. I read the job description and everything screamed me. I applied and got it. Then, to make that extra icing on top, I got the executive position of a Marketing Director at one of the university's student societies. So before I got my head straight I ended up still doing BridgeClimb, my public and private tutoring and now with these two additional responsibilities. Again, hard work balancing everything but everything went by really well surprisingly once again and I even managed to even squeeze in some personal commitments here and there.

Now, two other fantastic opportunities had opened up and I just can't bring myself to say no to. One is a Legal Intern position at my university and another is helping out with someone's start up business and personal projects and she is someone I've looked up to since last year after meeting her at a law conference. I am not confident about getting the Legal position because I made a very careless and easily avoidable mistake during the interviews. I think recently I have definitely been all up in my head and got a bit full of myself so this is a mistake I will remember for a long time to come and use it to keep reminding myself to never repeat it. Regardless, my point is, is that it seems like I just can't bring myself to slow down but I think I probably should...

Lately, it appears everyone around me is either proud and envious of what I've done in the past year and a half. Besides all the work and academic commitments I have already discussed, I brought my own car and moved out to Chippendale, Central Park for a while. Some have heavily criticised my 'changes' and I definitely see where they are coming from. However, at the same time, I also want people to know, and this includes my parents, of what I've done and gone through in the past twenty-one months. To be understanding of my fear of failure and fall behind in life and that is why I can't slow down, and also for my friends especially to appreciate that I have worked immensely hard to have what I own today and I made a lot of sacrifices. I am tired and I wish everyone around me would cut me some slack whether it's the lack of time I have for personal commitments or for having 'the things I have, which I have brought and earned myself, that most people our age can't have'.

Trust me. I am having a hard time figuring out whether or not this is all worth it, or if I am doing the right thing. I have doubts about various things every single day as soon as I open my eyes.

For now though, since I am still unsure, I will most likely keep on going. I hope that I will have the strength to continue. Even if I do pause, I hope it is not a sign that I am weak but that I am simply recovering and preparing to become even stronger. Even if one day I do break down, it will be alright and I will soon find the strength to stand back up and move forward once again.

Labels: life, thoughts, university

The morning start off pretty well, with the news of Khan being found guilty of murder for the death of Mr. Chris Noble. If you haven't been following the news it all began in September 2014 when Adeel Ahmad Khan decided to set his own convenience store on fire, despite knowing that there are various individuals and families living above the store. It caused an explosion and fire, which ultimately resulted in the death of Mr. Noble and mother Mrs. Bianka O'Brien and her son, Jude.

Allegedly, Khan decided to set his Rozelle store on fire in attempting to retrieve insurance compensation for it, as he was later revealed to be in debt of over $300,000 AUD. Granted, I really haven't followed this story closely and continuously enough to know of all the public details but from the amount of news articles and court reports I have read on it, I can conclude that innocent lives were taken far too early that day due to the greed and brutality of another human-being. According to court recounts, Khan showed no display of emotion when the juries returned with a guilty verdict. 

Juries are yet to decided on whether Khan should be found guilty of the murder of Mrs O'Brien and her son due to the manner of conduction of the case and trial, with different sets of relevant facts for O'Brien and Noble. I am hopeful though.

In other news, it really has been a while since my last update. A lot has happened, mostly good things. It's funny how things can change so much in just a few months. I'll save them for another day, when I am not actually supposed to be studying for my finals. 

Second year of university. Tort Law. Criminal Law. Accounting B. 

Labels: life, university

Beginnings, Ends and In-betweens. 

Labels: life

"Thing Called Love" 
- Above and Beyond

Labels: life, lyrics

First post of 2014. I can't believe I didn't even post anything in January - first miss in four years, dating all the way back to 2009 (this blog started in December 2008). This basically means that right here, I have - attempted to anyway - documented various events of my short life from Year 7 onwards; beginning to high school to now the upcoming end. Six years. 

I am embarrassed of the immaturity that flows through the entries of my early blogging years but I don't want to go back and delete them. It'll be the equivalent of editing or removing parts of the flaws that underpins the foundation of developing you into the person with the identity you have today, and deep inside we all know that's not humanely possible in real life so why do it here? I'm more than happy to embrace those cringe worthy lines. Maybe six years from now I'll be reading this very post and think "heck, why was I trying to be so deep?" or maybe just a "WTF" moment but you know, we all have to work with our ever changing expectations, it wouldn't be fair to judge the past with the current standards now would it?

Year 12 started last year and so in theory I'm reaching the end of Term 2 already. Year 11 passed like a breeze - a good, comforting, warming breeze. I hope I can say the same thing for this year. 

Officially finished with my half-yearlies yesterday. The two last subjects were English Extension and Modern History. As usual, I try not to self-evaluate after exams so I didn't really think much about them afterwards. I have a general idea of what I want to do after high school but what you want to do is different from what you can do. For now I'll just have to try my best and ensure everything's done to the best of my abilities.

Mum came back with my brother from their one month and a half holiday trip and she brought back some of the best presents: books -- a lot of them, good ones too. I am waiting diligently for the translation of Haruki Murakami's newest novel Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage to be released, scheduled for sometime in August (birthday month, coincidence much?). Murakami is also publishing a new short stories collection so it'll take a while before the English translation is available but nevertheless, I'm excited because my appreciation for short stores is growing day by day. Personally I think they should be more difficult to nail than novels or novellas. Since it's a short, meaning limited in the volume of words, it also has to be concise. To have a great short story you really have to judicial about what to write. That's why short stories that manages to leave behind a long message always amaze me. 

What else? Picking up a copy of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children: Hollow City. Starting Battle Royale , The Marriage Plot and finish off the rest of my Murakami collection. Before all that though, I should really finish Memoirs of a Geisha for my History Extension project and Wuthering Heights (in this case, actually open the book). Frankenstein was surprisingly good. If I have to list a list of the books school has made me read in a order of preference, it would probably be third, after The Great Gatsby and 1984, then you have Fahrenheit 451, Utopia and Northanger Abbey. 

Initially I was angry with prescribed texts for assassinating the joy of reading. It's just less fun when you are forced to read a particular work. The worst bit is when you know you can't read it for pure enjoyment, rather you have to do an "in-depth analysis" and later write an essay about it. It just kills reading. Of course, I shouldn't complain because it has introduced me to some great authors, like George Orwell and F. Scott Fitzgerald, now my favourite author after Murakami. Fortunately the joy is coming back. 

As the HSC is sneaking somewhere around the corner and getting closer every second I've rediscovered my appreciation for books. Don't get me wrong, I don't really have time to read them (we are well into March and the only book I've actually managed to finish so far is 160 170 180 by Chen Chen) but I've been ordering various books and crossing them off my wish list. It releases my stress -- not compulsive internet shopping -- but when they arrive in the mail and I place them onto my own book shelves, knowing they're there, waiting to be read. It also encourages me to do well, so I won't feel guilty when I do get through them after the big exam in November. 

Phew, that was a long post. Perhaps it'll make up for my absence in the past three months. Till  next time. 

Listening: XO by Beyonce
Reading: A Journey, Through Time, with Anthony III by Anthony 
Addicted: good books and short stories

Labels: life, school

Year 11 officially finished three days ago, for me anyway. For a selected few it ended more than a week earlier, but I'm actually glad I finished late, to be able to finish on the actual last day, for both Year 11 and 12 alike. For the last two weeks or so I was preparing and sitting for the yearly exams, with English Extension being the last exam. 

So, I can't say I felt good with every single exam, because I know I definitely made mistakes and so many things I could have done better but there's no point in saying this now. All I can do now is simply wait for the actual results to arrive. 

On the last day, to mark the end of Year 11, yearly exams and just stress from the past month in general, I met up with a friend I've known since primary. Since we go to different schools now we have a tradition of some sort, if you will, to catch up once every school holidays. What do we do? We just talk, and if you want to be specific, I guess 'gossip' will be a better word, but I prefer 'catching up'. We just share stories of ourselves and those around us, such as a event that we can't help but judge silently (hey, we are humans too), or the internal changes we've noticed on some friends and the list goes on really. 

What really caught my attention that day was the whole talk on those around us who are considered to be popular, and we would become sentimental over their previous self - the one we knew, and were much more comfortable with. Don't get me wrong, not all changes are bad, there has been some good changes in friends we've noticed, but unfortunately the negatives overrides the positives. At the end of the day, the so called positive changes to me is really about getting to know yourself and becoming more you - individualized. 

If the real you is dropping out of school and start working at this age or going out to as many parties as possible in order to become known as the popular one, then so be it. Then there should be no negatives I hear you thinking? Well, there are some who I feel who are this way because the people around them are acting and expecting a similar behavior. If you are a certain way due to expectations then you are not yourself, period, and of course you can't claim to be an individual, not a happy one at the end of the day anyway. The again, these are just my opinions, of course I hope the people we talked about were not influenced, but rather this is who they truly are. 

I'm glad I was able to realize this early. Maybe it's due to our schooling years coming to an end soon, recently a lot of people have been discussing about the times when they just entered high school, and as a result some have been saying to me, "I remember when you were in Year 8, you looked a lot better", yeah well, I wasn't happy. Truth to be told I agree with the whole appearance comment. Of course I looked better. I was underweight, wore make up every single day and dyed my hair every three weeks or so. But was I happy? Those are two very different things; looking good on the outside and feeling good on the inside. Sure, since I gained weight, chopped my hair (literally) and stopped wearing make up in Year 9 people have made comments, but I was a much more happier person back then and I didn't really give a damn if my facebook photos were no longer liked by as many people or people stopped inviting me to events. I became a happier person. Why? I don't know, but I think it has something among the lines of truly getting to know myself better and what I'm comfortable with. Like I said, if for you it's partying and for me it's staying at home with a good book then so be it, I'm not going to judge you so you shouldn't judge in return either. 

Anyway, to celebrate the first day of holidays, technically today, being Monday and all, I played Sims for a few hours, finished the latest issue of Frankie, read Atonement for a while, and surfed the net. Productive I know, but isn't that the whole point of having a holiday? To be so productive is the whole purpose of having a break. I think I might finished the night off with an episode of Breaking Bad and the film The Help or maybe Kill Kill instead. 

In other news, I can't believe we're already into September and I've only posted six entries this year. I still remember the days when I tried to blog at least once every two days, then slowly it turned into once a week, a month... There were things I wanted to record, but I couldn't, not on here anyway. Of course I have an actual journal in real life, so most things go in there instead. I guess I became more lazy overtime knowing I lost the majority of my followers due to my long absence. What's more I've had another online blog located on another server for about two years now, and I'm much more happier with the audience over there as compared to here. Will I ever give up Blogger? Nah. I started this in Year 6 so it's been with me for quite sometime, even if I stop updating here on the future I will never delete this place. I may set it to private instead, but I will never be able to terminate it completely. 

Wow, this just might be my longest entry in a year, or maybe even more :B

Listening: Say Love (사랑한다 말해요) - Lim Kim 

Reading: too many to list 

Labels: life, random, school

The hours, the days, sometimes they just swing by in a flash. I get tired so easily, before I know it it's already the afternoon and I have done absolutely nothing because I just want to fall into my bed and never wake up again. If it all just ends like that then I don't have to deal with anything anymore. Does this given off the impression of being weak? So be it. 

Underneath it all, do we really have a family? Or are we just different and soulless individuals living under the same roof? 

Labels: family, life

What do you mean I actually have a blog? Ha. I remember I used to update every single day. Damn, wasn't I annoying? Sorry it took me so long to realise it myself. So I just came back from my one month long holiday trip two nights ago and let's just say that at the end of the day, I love nothing more than my own bedroom. 

There's only a few more days until I begin Year 11. I'm not as excited as I should be, simply because I don't think I am ready yet. Then again, I didn't think I was ready for Year 10. Look at me now, at least I survived and better than expected. 

2013, please be kind to me. 

Listening: MFBTY - Sweet Dream Reading: Addicted: 

Labels: life

Labels: angry, life

Listening: Kill This Love – Epik High 

Reading: 1Q84 – Haruki Murakami 

Labels: life, school

In just a week I will be starting the last term of Year Ten. Maybe it's because I haven't been posting very much but it feels like this year will be ending sooner than I expected. In February I complained about stress and subject selections, not knowing what to do and what I am capable of and now I'm always at the end of the journey - for now anyway. 

My subjects for next year have all been confirmed two weeks ago and I got all of my choices, that's something worth celebrating. I am still unsure over maths, but what's the worst thing that can possibly happen? If it really doesn't work out well then I guess I might just drop it during the first four weeks... Fingers crossed everything will go well. 

Before I worry about that though, I really should start studying for my yearly exams. Surprisingly enough, even though I did study harder than usual it was still unexpected, I got a quite decent report for my half yearly. More than decent in fact but I don't want to jinx anything. Hopefully, if luck is really by my side this year after all, I would be able to achieve the same results, if not even better for my yearly. 

Holidays... Not much to share. Been staying at home and feeding myself with Gentleman's Dignity and Bridal Mask. I am becoming more boring and happier. 

Labels: life, school

My last entry dated all the way back in May, proving just how lazy I have gotten after Year Ten started. I do have legit reasons - at least for me anyway. School, isn't that enough of an excuse? It's paid off though, I am more than happy with my half-yearly report, the best I've ever gotten in fact. They do say how much you put in is how you you gain back yes?

Due to my inner nerd being up-front for so long there really isn't much to share. Would you like to hear about how I studied for my exams? Ha. If I have to share something it would be that under the influence of my friends I decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey. Despite it being a 'rated' novel I am not ashamed to admit I read it, finished the whole series in fact, in just a week. Curiousity got the best of me. I can see why it's so popular, especially among women but in terms of how capable the author Mrs. E.L.James is, she's still on the level of online fan-fiction, which is what she started off with. The rave right now isn't going to last forever and based on her writing abilities it'll be hard to have another work published and bcome as popular as Fifty Shades. James doesn't need another though, she's earned more than enough just from these three books in the past few months.With a movie production coming along and the book still doing pretty well in terms of sales who needs to write another book anyway?

What else is there to share? Vampire Idol which I started watching a few weeks back. I'm currently twenty-five episodes in with another fifty to go perhaps? Surprisngly, it's good. I wasn't expecting much, watching it just for the face of Lee Soo Hyuk, worthy enough. The writing and directing however is more enjoyable than I thought. They story-line is simple enough ti follow and once you get past that stubborn stage of the first few episodes you're in for a smooth ride. Lately because of the stress I have been feeling from school a drama like this = fast paced and funny really does cheer me up.

There's also Vampire Prosecutor 2 I am looking forward to. Mum's watching Flower Boy Ramyun Shop (did I even spell that right? My hangul is really going down...) and raving about Jung Ill Woo. Speaking of kimchi, those who have watched the drama would understand the link here - my mum decided we should go Korean BBQ for my birthday. Fine by me, I haven't had kimchi for ages.

Labels: life, school

Labels: life

Labels: life, school

Yeah, I remember those days, when I used to update every single day. Was my life that interesting back then or did I just go on and on about useless events? The second one makes more sense to me. There's hardly anything worthy of talking about these days. Unless you think going to school is interesting enough for minor details.


I like going to school, but it isn't the most exciting thing. Especially not when you're in Year 10. I can only imagine what the next two years would be like. To say I am just slightly nervous about the tests coming up would be the understatement of mine in a century. I am beyond stressed. Of course, sitting here and typing this wouldn't really help but it's a nice break from all the studying. 


My mum and Chris' finally coming back next Sunday. Would it be weird if I just end the entry here? Maybe, but I have nothing else to share. 


Until next time. 

Listening: Shine Over Me - Wanting Reading: I Think There's Something Wrong With Me - Nigel SmithAddicted: 

Labels: life

A while back ago I promised I would try and use my photography from now for the top picture on each entry and I failed after two attempts. It's not that I have don't have enough photos, in fact I have folders and folders filled with final edits, all completed but I guess I'm so lazy that I can't even be bothered uploading them to a file image server to use.

Instead of starting off again with what I should do and what I promise to do, I'll start with what I have been doing. Besides busy procrastinating (which I really shouldn't because I have a major Maths exam coming up this very Thursday) I have been busy finishing off the dramas I have been watching. Yes, before you all start to judge me you should know I hardly ever watch them. Maybe around five each year, but once I start I can't stop.

For Korean dramas, which for the majority I honestly cannot get into or relate to because they're so cliche, there'll always be a few exceptions. One prime example would be my ultimate bias Lee Junki. I will literally get through all the way of a really bad drama just to see his face. He's a good actor don't get me wrong (at least he started it off that way in The King and the Clown) but he slowly lost it after My Girl.

Take Hero for example, the directing and acting was alright but the whole story is so boring that I lost interest after five episodes but still, I managed to finish it all for that face of his. Orignally I had really high expectations because the drama revolves around a photojournalist and as someone who's really interested in journalism, I really wanted to see it despite the 'this-show-is-so-boring' reviews out there. Lesson learnt; never ignore the majority's view.

The story here today is pretty much similar, except all you need to do is replace Lee Junki with Park Shi Hoo but with better acting, directing and the overall plot. While I'm here, bless South Korea for making their men going to the army. They always come back looking like a completely differnet person. Korean dramas have an unspoken tradition of granting shower scenes for recently army returned male actors (uh, hello? Abs? Yeah, pretty obvious) and sometimes it does get a bit overrated but hey, I am not complaining.

In just two weeks I finished five dramas, maybe it's not a lot for some out there but for me - someone who barely gets through five a year is huge. I read rave reviews for two of them and I just couldn't help it. The two being Princess' Man and Flower Boy Ramen Shop. Judging from the title of them I wasn't exactly expecting anything. Sorry, but flower boy instant noodle shop? Yeah... But I was more than impressed at the end.

49 Days was enjoyable as well and What's Up is way underrated compared to the overrated, obviously being Dream High 2. Now I am really ready to announce my farwell to dramas this year. For now anyways.

In other news, my Nikon D70 recently passed away. It's been seven years so I'm not exactly surprised but I will miss it terribly. Thank you for being always there for me. The new Nikon D700 won't be able to replace you - ever.

Labels: life

(Bye bye Facebook)
So I finally switched to the new Blogger layout which has been available forever. Everything is new and it will take a while for me to get used to it but I feel like the change is actually towards the better. I actually like this new design, I feel easier to blog and the post settings have improved by a lot. Unlike Facebook's up-coming time line. At the moment my profile is still waiting to be 'upgraded' but from what I've been seeing so far on other people's profiles, I absolutely dislike it. In fact I might deactivate my account as soon as it switches to the time line view, since I'm not that active on it any more. Blogger, how shall I express my love towards you? Seriously. I like the new Blogger Dashboard so much I feel like I'm actually going to blog more now. 


To start off, I lost my phone today. Yes - again. People just love my phone. Whoever took it, I hope you will have a great sleep tonight and you won't end up feeling guilty. Who am I kidding? You probably do these type of stuff all the time. Have fun going through my photos, messages and everything. You crazy paedophile stalker. Besides losing all those adorable videos of my brother (which matters the most but I'll get over it eventually... maybe... no... who am I kidding, you can never ever replace those videos) I have also lost all of my contact numbers. Which really doesn't bother me that much since I don't talk to more than half of the people I have but collecting all the numbers I need will definitely be a pain in the behind. Maybe it's a sign - to start everything from scratch, yeah, including my social life which I never really had one. Are you trying to tell me that 2012 will be a life changing year here? Ha. 


Since my plan won't be finished until February next year I guess I will just be phone-less in the mean time. During holidays, that's right. It just started yesterday officially and I have already lost my phone. Why am I stressing myself so much? It's not like I used to be on it 24/7, in fact, I check it every two-three days. I guess knowing the fact you don't have it right there next to you is a different story. 


Having typed all that about my phone, it's time for something else. I brought the dress I would be wearing to the party on the cruise. I've actually never ever went shopping for a proper party dress before and I was right, it was deadly boring. I hate how you have to try on every single one to see if it looks nice, apparently according to my mum you can never judge if a dress (or clothing in general) will look good on you unless you try it on. She claims it to be something that everyone knows. Well, I didn't. In the end, after two hours of shopping around we both finally settled on a blue one. I would show you guys what it looks like but I can't be bothered. 


I shall end the entry here by saying I am really tired and I am going to sleep. 

Labels: life

This guy right here is perfection. No, I'm kidding but he has such unique features. Male models usually don't leave a deep impression for me but this guy here did - big time.

Labels: life

August and anything but bored. How did I ever mange to update every single day? Since majority of my time are being taken over my school and all, my life is very boring right now and with this I don't really see what I should type about any more. It was never a "all-about-my-life" place but lately I have been feeling really uninspired and tired.

Labels: life

My name is Joanne and I'm currently a nineteen year old business and law student studying in Sydney, Australia. I started this blog seven years ago and a lot has changed since then but some things will always remain the same - I still enjoy rainbow lollipops, playing Sims and L4D. Even today, you will continue to most likely to find me playing drums for my neighbours at night. There will always be something special about Takanori Matsumoto, through all the good and bad times, his voice is always the best thing to hear. Before you ask me something please check the F.A.Q. Master List.

걸스홀릭 Forever ~ < 3
Proud former AL Elite Admin


UPDATED (28/8/13):
+ These ■ happy family ■ happy brother